This is Hacker Public Radio episode 4,083 for Wednesday, the 27th of March 2024.
Today's show is entitled, Drive Cast Man Talk.
It is hosted by some guy on the internet and is about nine minutes long.
It carries an explicit flag.
The summary is.
Let's go to discuss his men's issues while driving.
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Hello and welcome to another episode of Hacker Public Radio.
I'm your host, some guy on the internet.
I like to start off with a little bit of a warning.
This episode may not be suitable for all listeners.
With that said, let's begin.
Now today's topic concerns men, men of all ages, and it's a simple one, but I do believe
their parents should have the option as to whether or not their children should hear
this episode or not.
So pause now.
Alright, I assume that you've made that decision and we can carry forward.
I don't know about you, but as a man, I really don't like to see anything, anything
resembling moisture around the toilet seat in the restaurant.
You think that mostly young men have this problem and most people assume that you have
trouble seeing, you know, maybe you can't aim properly, that kind of thing, and we've
all seen it.
That could be multiple issues.
I've seen issues where it actually wasn't the men causing the moisture pool in around
the toilet.
It was that the toilet was flush and so, so hard, like it was splashing water out.
And of course sometimes there's leaks or condensation, condensation could build up on the
reservoir and drip down onto the floor, causing a pool around the toilet as well.
But excluding all of those, I'm talking about for men that usually end up missing the bowl
or, you know, they're target and hitting the floor or outside of the bowl.
I'm going to offer a little bit of advice.
Now first thing first, you don't want to wait until you're desperate to relieve yourself.
As a driver, a lot of times when I'm on the road, there may not be the option to just
stop at the nearest place and you, you know, you know, 53 foot vehicle, a lot of times
those options don't exist for you, so you really have to play in your day.
And one of the things that I end up doing is every time I'm near a facility, a restaurant,
I use it, rather think I have to or not, I go in there.
One of the first things I do when I walk into any establishment, any building, is I go
look for the restroom, immediate.
That's the first thing I want to tackle because when I'm done here and I have to leave this
place, you know, I got a job to do, rather I'm at work or not, like, rather I'm just
in my personal vehicle or in the rig, whatever.
I go look for the restroom whenever I hop out the vehicle, I take care of that first.
Because once that's out the way, that means there's less of a chance I'm going to get
desperate to do that when I'm on the road.
Sometimes you can just stuck in traffic and be out there all day long, you know what I mean?
And desperation will build up on you.
Once you make sure that you're not going to end up desperate to go, that you're going
whenever the opportunity presents itself, that's one way of making sure you don't end up
you know, in that panic mode rushing me get in there and then, you know, now you're acting
without thinking, you know what I mean.
So another tip, when you go in there, now this is, if you're at a Sentinel, I think it's a
little harder for you to miss at the Sentinel.
And what I mean about, uh, depending on where you from, the Sentinel is the standing toilet,
right?
You're standing up facing it and it is very wide and has like, I guess, uh, walls making
it very difficult for you to miss.
So excluding that, I'm talking about a traditional toilet bowl, grab yourself one sheet
of toilet paper.
Now after you got that one sheet of toilet paper, go ahead and position yourself in front
of the toilet and before you cut loose, take that toilet paper and first use it to rub
the urethro, like, like you're clearing away anything that may be there.
Now you don't have to use it like you're scouring of a potter or anything now, you know,
you just quickly remove anything that may be there.
And then, here's, here's the next step once you use the paper to remove everything, hold
onto the paper hand.
Don't just toss it away.
Using your index finger and thumb, I want you to imagine holding a cigar in between your
index finger and thumb and then rolling this cigar back and forth in between the index
finger and thumb, as though you're loosening up the tobacco in the cigar, you're going
to perform that action with the head of the penis, a little bit closer toward the urethro,
the opening.
This technique is going to help loosen up anything that may be blocking the opening.
So you first wiped it away with the toilet paper, then you rolled to help loosen anything
else up.
You can give it one more quick wipe if you want, but if not, I want you to imagine when
you're at the sink, right?
And you turn the faucet handle or lift it, whatever design handle you have at the faucet,
you turn the faucet on and then off really quickly so that a very short jet of water exits
the faucet.
I want you to imagine doing that, but with your bladder, using the muscles that control
your bladder, just allow a short jet of urine to pass through.
And what that's going to tell you is rather not you cleared the urethro or not, because
if you haven't, well, there's much less to clean up, now that you know that you haven't
fully cleared the opening, but if you have cleared it, and you can go ahead and cut loose
and finish the job and don't shake at the end.
That's why you held on to the rest of that toilet paper.
When you're done, you use the paper to dry up, or you do is just place it at the opening,
you're not packing it in or anything silly, you don't be crazy here, but you're just
placing it there to opening and you know, the remainder will soak into the paper, you
toss it in the bowl, if you did make a mess, now's the time for you to clean it out.
Now you can close the seat, you know, put the lid down there, everything flush and head,
head toward the sink and clean yourself up and head out.
Now the reason you may have to go through these steps just in case you're wondering,
if you're a young man, especially in the reason I said a young man, is because there's
a good chance with those hormones of yours, you're probably getting a hard on every time
the wind blows and the body naturally produces secretions.
These secretions, as they make their way through, may, you know, when they get to the
opening of the penis, they'll dry, causing a partial blockage, so if you don't clean it,
you'll wipe it up, but at partial blockage, when you go to urinate, it's going to be like
when you've got the garden hose and you put your thumb on the end of the garden hose
and then the water sprays in every direction, yeah, that's what you're doing.
So you want to go ahead and clear that up before you cut loose.
And the same thing is especially true, if you're a mature male or an adult male, whatever
you want to call it, and you have recently engaged in sexual intercourse or any activity
where you have ejaculated.
This is another secretion that you're going to be dealing with.
Again, when you head in front of the toilet, follow those steps, you'll remove the blockage
and then you can cut loose without wetting up all over the place.
So now that you're better understand the situation, it's not just a matter of the person
not being able to see and missing the toilet, it's just that nobody really explained
that there's a process.
And if you don't know that there is a process, well, you know, as good chance you could
have negative results.
So respect the process.
Stop giving everybody a hard time whenever this kind of thing happens, I want you to think
about it.
Just because you're a human being and you have a body, does not mean you fully understand
your body.
This is true with everyone, man and women.
Just in this topic we're dealing with, as I've heard it said, penis owners.
Alright, I think that's about it.
You guys have a good one, catch it in the next episode.
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